Scene one: Myself and cheetah bestie go to my lover "Fatty" 's house to retrieve her plate. I am slightly annoyed since Fatty never responds to my texts or phone calls (he claims he never got them...can you imagine the nerve this child has?) and so I act like I'm annoyed and am so not in the mood to deal with Fatty and his incessant talking (I'm 99.9 percent sure he loves the sound of his own voice he talks that much) and we leave. I shoot him a text apologizing for my irritable behavior since I was upset and having mixed feelings on whether I like him or not. He texts me back and says it's fine and he doesn't hate me and if I need to talk, he's there...prec right?
Intermission: I call Fatty one night to ask him something but he's watching a movie so we text instead...normal right? I have normal Angie sass in my texting which he seems to be fine with.
Scene Two: Movie night with the cheetah bestie and Fatty's sister. (In case you're that curious, we watched Bride Wars...so freaking adorable) Everything is fine and we are having a great night of girl bonding and then in walks Fatty. I get excited just knowing he's there. He is talking to his sister and then before he goes to join the boys for a night of male bonding, he decides to announce to the world that he's going to give my cheetah bestie a hug. He then continues to ignore my presence and announces to the world that he is off to his room that apparently he never leaves (I had said this in a previous text message and this is the only mention from him that would even come close to acknowledging my presence). I try and am successful in holding back the flood of tears that want to escape my eyes. My heart is starting to break at this point.
Intermission: Car ride home after movie night. I'm still in shock that he hasn't said anything to me but figure that his rude behavior was only triggered by mine the other night even though I had apologized and thought everything was fine. Cheetah bestie and I get to my apartment and we start talking about it for the Nth time trying to figure out what the F just happened. I start talking about it and almost start crying but since I have a fear of crying in front of others, hold back the tears as best as I can and say goodbye to the Cheetah bestie and escape into my apartment.
Scene Three: I get to my bedroom and start to think about how good the night had been until Fatty came home. I know I had been a complete mother biotch the other night but I'm still a girl and when it comes to things like lovers, I can cry a river just like any normal girl. I texted Fatty but he didn't respond which is typical for him but when it comes to someone feeling hurt or being sad, usually he'll respond. (The other night, he told me that I am the type of person who uses anger to mask sadness...so true. So if you get that much about me, why the L do you feel the need to act like a complete douche?) The way he ignored me made me think of this time where this teacher asked me if I knew what it felt like to be invisible to other people. This thought made my eyes start to water and I knew the tears couldn't be kept at bay for much longer. I cried and I cried until I couldn't breathe and had to get tissue so I could clear my airways. I'm pretty sure I cried myself to sleep. When getting up for church, I sat up and all of a sudden had this mad rush of a headache come to my head and I almost vomited the pain was that intense. I then decided church was so not going to happen since someone would ask how I was and then the tears would start again. Then, I remembered how awful my night had been and the tears started again. I decided it was best to go back to bed so I feel asleep crying again. This cycle continued throughout most of the day. My HT's decided to pop over to meet me and I had to wipe my eyes and look like I hadn't been crying for the past 30 minutes...geez louise. Then I had to do some hw and started to have a life even though thinking of how gay Fatty is being is still bringing tears to my eyes at least once an hour...ridic.
I effing hate the fact that for some reason Fatty is hating me right now. I called him (he didn't answer naturally) and left him a V-mail saying that I want to talk so we'll see how that goes (he'll most likely claim he never received it). I wish this would be resolved since I have 2 exams, 2 classes, volunteer work, an appointment, FHE, and a job interview tomo. If I suck at everything or have another BD tomo, I'm going to seriously consider (but never actually do) going over to his house, trashing his room, keying his yellow jeep and slashing his tires. If there's one girl who doesn't do well being ignored, it's me. It kills me one the inside like a lot. I just pray that I can get through tomorrow fine. Alright world, peace and loves yo.
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